Why Your Single Season Will Change the Way You Pursue God's Calling (And Why That's Perfect)

You're crushing it in your career, your friends look up to you, and from the outside, you've got it all together. But inside? You're watching everyone around you walk down the aisle while you're still walking... well, alone. And somewhere between scrolling through another engagement announcement and wondering what's wrong with you, you've started to question if God even cares about the desires of your heart.

Girl, I need you to hear this: Your single season isn't a punishment or a delay. It's preparation.

What if I told you that this season you're in: the one that feels like waiting: is actually the most transformative time for discovering and pursuing God's calling on your life? And what if this "frustrating" period is exactly what you need to step into the fullness of who God created you to be?

Let me show you why your single season is about to change everything about how you pursue God's calling, and why that's absolutely perfect.

Right now, you have something that becomes incredibly precious and scarce in other seasons of life: uninterrupted time with God. I know, I know: you're probably thinking, "Shaniece, I don't want time, I want a husband!" But stay with me here.

When you don't have a spouse's needs to consider, children to care for, or the beautiful complexity that comes with marriage, you have a unique opportunity to dive deep into your relationship with the Lord. This isn't about filling time until something better comes along: this is about building the spiritual foundation that will anchor every other season of your life.

Think about it: When was the last time you could spend an entire Saturday morning in prayer without anyone needing you? When could you last take that online course, attend that conference, or volunteer for that ministry without having to coordinate schedules or consider someone else's preferences?

This freedom isn't accidental, Sis. God is strategic about the seasons He places us in.

Here's what happens when you're not defining yourself in relation to someone else: you actually figure out who God created YOU to be. Not who you think you should be to attract the right person, not who your family expects you to be, but the authentic woman God designed with specific gifts, passions, and purposes.

During your single season, you have the emotional and mental space to explore:

• What brings you genuine joy (not just what looks good on paper)

• What values you want to build your life around

• What dreams you've been putting on the back burner

• What God whispers to your heart in the quiet moments

This self-discovery is absolutely crucial for discerning God's calling because you can't pursue what you're called to do if you don't know who you're called to be.

When your heart isn't divided between seeking God's will and anxiously wondering when "he" will show up, something beautiful happens: you start hearing the Lord more clearly. Without the emotional noise of relationship anxiety, dating stress, or constantly analyzing every interaction with the opposite sex, you can tune into God's frequency.

You start recognizing His voice in your career decisions, ministry opportunities, and life direction. You learn to trust His timing not just with relationships, but with everything.

And Girl, this skill? It's going to serve you for the rest of your life.

One of the most beautiful transformations that happens during your single season is learning to find your worth in Christ alone. When you're not looking to a relationship to validate you, complete you, or make you feel valuable, you discover that you already are all of those things because of who you are in Him.

This confidence changes everything about how you pursue your calling. You stop people-pleasing. You stop shrinking yourself to fit into spaces that weren't designed for you. You start taking bold steps because you know who you belong to and what you're capable of.

Here's where we need to flip the script, Sis. You're not in a holding pattern: you're in boot camp. God isn't making you wait for marriage; He's preparing you for purpose. And sometimes, that preparation requires your full attention.

Instead of waiting for something to happen, you get to actively do the work God has already called you to:

• Develop the skills you'll need for your calling

• Build the character required for the next level

• Establish the spiritual disciplines that will sustain you through any season

• Invest in the relationships and experiences that will shape your ministry

When you finally do transition into marriage (if that's God's plan), you won't be looking to your husband to give you purpose or direction. You'll enter that season already secure in your identity and clear about your calling.

This is the season where God does some of His most transformative work. Without the beautiful distractions that come with marriage and family, you have the space to:

Heal what needs healing. Those insecurities, those trust issues, those areas where you're still believing lies about yourself: now is the time to let God do that deep work.

Develop your gifts. That business idea, that ministry vision, those talents you've been putting off: pour into them now.

Build your prayer life. Establish the spiritual disciplines that will carry you through every season.

Pursue your education. Whether that's formal education, reading, courses, or life experiences: invest in your growth.

Serve in ministry. Find where God wants to use you in His Kingdom work right now.

Girl, what if instead of asking "When will I get married?" you started asking "What is God calling me to do right now?" What if instead of feeling behind, you started feeling blessed to have this focused time with the Lord?

Your single season is preparing you to be:

• A woman who knows her worth isn't tied to her relationship status

• A wife who brings wholeness to marriage instead of looking for it

• A leader who's confident in her calling

• A believer whose faith is rooted in personal experience, not circumstance

This season isn't about perfecting yourself for someone else: it's about becoming who God created you to be for His glory and your fulfillment.

Here's what I need you to understand: Every moment you spend anxiously waiting for marriage is a moment you could be actively building the life God has called you to. Your purpose isn't on hold until you get a ring. Your value isn't determined by your dating life. Your season isn't less important because it doesn't look like everyone else's.

God has you in this season for such a time as this. There are doors only single you can walk through. There are ministries only single you can serve in with your whole heart. There are dreams only single you has the freedom to pursue.

When you embrace this season instead of enduring it, when you pursue your calling with your whole heart instead of half-heartedly while waiting for "real life" to begin, something miraculous happens: you start thriving instead of just surviving.

And Sis, a thriving, purpose-driven woman who knows her worth in Christ? That's exactly the woman God can use to impact His Kingdom in ways you never imagined.

Ready to embrace your single season as the transformative time it's meant to be? If you're tired of feeling anxious about marriage and ready to discover the fullness of God's calling on your life right now, I'd love to support you on this journey. At Valued Inspired Purposed Ministries, we provide coaching and resources specifically designed to help high-achieving Christian women like you thrive in every season. You don't have to navigate this alone: let's walk this path together and discover the beautiful purpose God has for your life today.